Off-Schedule Again...

Well after a long, arduous week of work, I'm back to writing. Not sure if anything is going to make sense because my brain is officially fried, but some would argue that it's always been that way. Maybe my ability to black-out is affecting that, I'm not sure. Oh well. Onto my week that was and maybe a bit something off-track from the usual useless banter that I throw down on this website. First, I'm sorry to the loyal readers for not having something to read and/or smirk at. Here's something...

For someone that's not a very political person, today, I just found out that maybe I do have some thoughts concerning politics. I just found out that my cousin, (dad's cousin's son, so my 2nd cousin?? Doesn't matter really, I talk to the kid on the phone, kept in touch with him in college, we're relatively close), just got sent over to Iraq to fight in this war that apparently we're involved in. I'm kidding. I know we're in a war, and I support the troops 150%, you can bank on that, but I've not really had anything hit me harder than when I heard this news today. I've been involved with what's been going on, but not to the extent of maybe I should be. Everyday, when I pick up the newspaper, I get a knot in my stomach when the headlines read that more troops were killed, now my cousin, family, friend is over there fighting this war, and there is a possibility, no matter how slight, that those headlines could read his name one day. God forbid, but I can't help but think that. Granted, there are tens if not hundreds of thousands of troops that will come back unscathed, and I think Jimmy Edwards will be one of them, but... So basically what I'm saying is back the troops. I've heard and now seen the effects and strains it can put on a mother, father, brother and sister, grandparents, and even second cousins.

Something unrelated, sort of, but as I was writing that last paragraph it reminded me. I do have a myspace page. I'm not going to tell you where it is, but if you know my full name, you'll be able to find it. I was searching for something the other day and ran across a page dedicated to 9/11. Having watched the second plane enter the second tower from the third floor at Seton Hall Prep in West Orange, NJ, and seeing parents of students walking in to pick up their kids with soot all over them, crying and then hearing about the fellow alumni, who we all knew, that were among the missing and presumed dead, I had a vested interest in this page. Granted, everyone was affected by this tragedy almost 5 years ago, but having it hit so close to home, I stopped by this webpage and read. And man oh man, it's gutwrenching to read. Almost hard to read.

On to somethings a little lighter. My liver hurts. I missed AYB3's bachelor party in Newport, RI this past weekend and for most of you, you know it was hard, damn near impossible for me to say no to a bachelor party for a friend, especially when you're "in" the wedding party, but I did. I had to really. Financially, it just didn't make sense for me to go, unfortunately. BUT, I did manage to drink my body weight in vodka/lemonades on Friday night. It got to the point that I didn't get out of bed on Saturday at all. It was really pretty sad. I've been hungover before and useless before, but this was a new definition of the both of them. I was hurting something awful. I don't think words can describe how hurting I was. I woke up at 11:30am, face down on my couch, legs hanging off the end. Apparently, (and no one knows for sure) I must have gotten up to get something to drink and just fell onto the couch not to move again until 11:30, when I got up and the headache kicked in, and stomach not feeling right. I did manage to go to Taco Bell and get some lunch, but came directly home, and ate A taco and went back to the bed. I watched tv for some time, then around 2:30pm, I took a nap. At 10:30pm, when I opened my eyes, I felt better but still not great, and then at 11:30, I got up and had a Gatorade. I think I could write a movie based on my Friday night though, even just from what I remember. I've been gathering facts from people, and suprisingly, I did nothing stupid. Seriously. I didn't, I promise. No peeing in public, nothing. But I was involved in some crazy happenings that I'm not sure I'm going to divulge on this open forum. I will tell some, who am I to hold details from you people. It all started on Thursday night when I called BamaBoy(new name on the blog, not a reader), he's a manager at my old job in mortgages who lives on the island too. I said, and I quote,
Me: What are you doing tomorrow?
BB: Don't know, why?
Me: Because I want to do some drinking with you on the island.
BB: okay.
So Friday came and I had softball. We got beat 24-2. My team had three hits, I had one. I only batted once. That's what happens when you only play three innings because of the TWENTY RUN RULE!!! Oh well, it happens. So I went home, BB was already down at the bar with some peeps so I thought it'd be a good idea to drink some beers quick to get a good base coat. Seven beers and thirty minutes later, I had put a second coat on. AND The Skulls was on, which happens to be one of my favorite dumb movies of all time. So BB called and asked where I was, I said that I was "chugging beers" and I'd be there in 10 minutes. This was at 9:45. At 10:40, I was leaving my place because the movie drew me in. We're drinking some beers down at the bar, I had my own pitcher because...everybody...that's how I roll. Then BB's girlfriend and married friend walk into the bar, and my roomie's there and another friend and his girlfriend are there as well. There's 7 of us. One of the girls suggests that we go to another bar across the street because, "they have liquor." Of course the first question I ask Joel, the bartender is "do you have lemonade?" Obviously, if you didn't skip down the page, you already know his answer. So 156 VL's later and the married girl loves her some Creegs, telling me that the only reason she's still with her husband is because of their son. All I hear though is, blah blah blah {censored}, blah blah blah. (yes, I censored my own writing), and then plants a kiss on me. Not sure how I was feeling about that, I stayed right in my seat and wondered if that would happen again. That's all I have to say about that. Later in the evening, me, BB, his girlfriend and married girl are at BB's place just hanging, drinking more beer, playing with their dog, laughing doing what I do best. The next thing I remember is BB's girlfriend pushing married girl to the ground and MG(married girl) is laying there in a heap, looking like she was dead. None of us did anything. BB's girl went to bed, and me and BB were looking at each other thinking, we should probably do something. Well BB's girl comes back out of the bedroom claiming to call the cops to get MG out of their house, to which MG grabs a wine bottle off the counter and hurls it across the kitchen, exploding it through the oven glass. Unfortunately, I was in the bathroom, but heard the loudest crashing noise I've ever heard. When I walked out, I heard screaming, BB called MG's husband to come pick her up. I walked outside when Husband came, and BB looked at me and said, "I think this night is over Creegs." I took the hint. I wanted to help clean up, but they wanted to asses the situation in the morning. So I called my roomate to tell him to stay awake because I had a story. He was at 7-11, which I thought I was near, and so I walked there to meet up with him. He was with a bartender from one of the island bars (super cute girl), and her friend. I wanted him to drive me home, he wanted a wing man, he won. I remember walking into the bartenders apartment, and she opened an Amstel Light for us all, and then the next thing I remember is being face down in my couch at 11:30 in the morning. That's my story. I pretty much said it all there. Even though I didn't think I was going to.

Hope everyone has a great week. I'm heading up to Jacksonville/Savannah this weekend for the ACC Baseball Tournament...er...I mean, Hunt and FineCheese's celebration of living in Savannah for one full year. Hope I write before then though. Thanks for reading!

Good Joke

Not posting anything original today, just got an email from an old friend today, and I laughed pretty hard at it. Not sure if it's funny, or that I wanted to just laugh really hard at something, anything. Being sick sucks! Enjoy!

This is why you should know your limits when drinking tequila.
An Oklahoma man walks into a bar, notices a very large jar on the counter, and sees that it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. He guesses there must be thousands of dollars in it. He approaches the bartender and asks, "What's up with the jar?" "Well, you pay $10 and if you pass three tests, you get all the money." The man certainly isn't going to pass this up. "What are the three tests?" "Pay first, those are the rules." says the bartender. So the man gives him the $10 and the bartender drops it into the jar. "OK," the bartender says, "Here's what you need to do: First - You have to drink that entire quart of pepper tequila, the whole thing, all at once...and you can't make a face while doing it. Second, there's a pit bull chained-up out back with a sore tooth. You have to remove the tooth with your bare hands. Third. - There's a 90-year old woman upstairs who has never reached orgasm during intercourse. You've gotta make things right for her." The Oklahoman is stunned. "I know I paid my $10, but I'm not an idiot! I won't do it! You have to be nuts to drink a quart of pepper tequila, and then do those other things..." "Your call," says the bartender, "but your money stays where it is." As time goes on and the Oklahoman has a few drinks, then a few more, he asks, "Where's the tequila?" He grabs the quart with both hands and downs it with a big slurp. He has tears streaming down both cheeks, but he doesn't make a face. Next, he staggers out back where the pit bull is chained-up and soon the people inside the bar hear a horribly noisy scuffle going on outside. They hear the pit bull barking, the guy screaming, the pit bull yelping and then, total silence. Just when they think the man surely must be dead, he staggers back into the bar, with his shirt ripped and large bloody scratches all over his body.

"Ok, where's the 90 year old woman with the sore tooth?"

First Softball Game and Savannah Invasion

Friday night was the resurrection of Creegs as "softball guy." I had my first game back into the great world of men's softball with my team from Ferman Chevrolet in Brandon, FL. It was good to be part of the team, I'd been crushing the snot out of the ball in practices and now it was time to show what I had on the field. Long story short, I went 1-3, weak grounder to short and a weak pop to left, and a single. I did have the play of the game, as cited by my teammates in the sixth inning when I was on first, the #7 batter popped up to right, I just started running around the bases because there were two outs. I heard cheers from our dugout so I knew that the ball had been dropped by the outfielder. I stop at third and take a look, to which I see the ball on the ground. I rev up the motor on this steam roller and head for the plate(not a smart move.) I take one glance to my left and see that the ball is being thrown towards the plate and I just dive into home. The ball goes over the catchers head and there wasn't a play, but my uniform(yes, we have uni's, I wear #14) was covered in brown and white dirt. The white coming from the foul lines. Got back in the dugout with people laughing and giving me high-fives(I love high-fives), some spectators even told me that I couldn't even approach their cars after the game, which was pretty funny. I was spitting dirt for the next two innings. Ferman did end up losing 15-9, in a spirited effort by the car boys. Losing by six to a team that beat us by 16 the first time around. Not too shabby. We're making progress. We did have the bases loaded with one out in the seventh inning with the #4 and #5 hitters up, and that's where the night ended for us. No game next week because of Mother's Day weekend, but we're back at it the week after. Good times, I'm glad to be back, and it's a good bunch of guys playing on a not good team.

Hunter, FineCheese, and Wolv invaded the West-Central Florida coast this weekend, and good times were had once again. Cheese had her way with some Jell-o shots, Wolv was a deer in headlights when I stole him from the rest of the group to continue binge drinking. Hunt was all smiles, enjoying the sun, the bars and the food. Good people, really. Looking forward to getting back up to Savannah to continue what we started down here. And by that I mean, Hunt and Cheese decided that 12:30 was past their bedtime on Saturday night. I think Cheese went a little hard a little early with Bill Cosby's favorite dessert and she sort of crashed out early. I thought she had packed "fun cheese," but apparently she left that in savannah. It's all good though. I give her a hard time, and she doesn't deserve it. I'm spoiled, in that I get to see them a lot, and it never stops amazing me how much of a good time we have, no matter what we're doing. Went to the beach on Saturday afternoon, and had a bunch of laughs. Ate dinner at Brother Hunter's house on Saturday night, more laughs ensued, and then the bar. (Still no call from our waitress, but I'm waiting with baited breath, haha)

Mark it on your calendars. End of the month, I will be invading Savannah yet again, after a long, unnecessary hiatus from there. Attitude Improvements will be running wild! Thanks again for the visit. Always good to have a sense of "home" around.

Busy week of work for me this week. Probably won't be too much going on, but I'll keep you loyals abreast of any exciting happenings in my world. Have a great week!

Finally!!!

Here it is. It's 11:11pm in the Tampa Bay area, and I wanted to go to bed, but I told my loyal readers that I would come up with a reflection on my recent trip for Smokey's Bachelor Party to Key West. In the same vain I would like to point out that my memory may be a bit shady and I may hold some details close to the vest to protect the innocent. If my memory serves me correct, and with my ability to "black-out," I doubt it will serve me at all, I don't believe we were assholes at all during the weekend, although mine was almost violated, but I'll save that for the next paragraph or so.

It all starts on Friday, when I got in the car to drive to Ft. Lauderdale to pick up a few of the buddies to drive to Key West. Six people got into a van, me and two others in the Liberty and headed on our way. Mind you, I had just packed all of my stuff up in boxes the night before for my roomate to move for me. He's a good seed, and I would like to publically thank him again for doing so, so that I could live some debaucherous moments with great friends. That trip from Lauderdale to Key West seems to take an eternity, and with AYB3's bladder, it did take an eternity. A stop every thirty miles or so, so that the kid could pee, and that's with peeing in a bottle twice in the car. Wow! So anyway, we get there and immediately head out to grad some drinks and some dinner at Margaritaville on Duval Street. Beers started flowing nicely, and I knew after the first one that it was going to be a long night. We head down to Hog's Breath among other places for some more binge drinking before heading to Mallory Square to indulge in some more adult beverages and the celebration of the sunset, which, if you haven't ever seen in Key West, it's pretty impressive. I highly recommend it. Me and Beef find the Hilton bar, where they serve Mojito's and my favorite Vodka/Lemonade. I made the mistake of telling the bartender that I didn't think there was any alcohol in my drink to which he made a vodka, with a splash of lemonade for my next drink. I now knew that I was in trouble for the rest of the night. Me and the Beef finally meet up with the rest of the crew at a bar with dancing and still more drinks, outdoor air and some girl that played Cinderella as part of the college program at Disney. Whatever, that's another story for another day. The funny part is that no one hooked up with her. Actually only one guy was hitting on her, worked it HARD for two days and still got nowhere, but we won't mention HAHN's name. What a puss. Anyway. We start drinking some more, maybe mixed in an adult establishment and a couple slices of pizza. Somehow, I don't remember how, me and the Beef get separated again from the group and decide to find the beach, or at least the water, which you'd think wouldn't be hard in Key West. Well, you'd be thinking wrong. We hopped many a fence and were in places that we definitely should not have been. Finally, we're walking down Duval St. back towards the hotel, when we're approached by three obviously homosexual men walking as well. One very intoxicated, like myself. My attention was somewhere else, and this intoxicated gentleman walked up to Beef and said, "which one of you boys is sleeping with me tonight" to which Beef pointed directly to me, and my attention got drawn back to the drunk and like a deer in headlights saw this man say, "You are CUTE!" and pinched my nipples, winked and went on his way. I think the Beef laughed so hard beer from earlier in the night came out his nose. Disturbed, but undaunted, we continued out trek to find water. We jump yet another fence and walk out onto a pier. One of the obviously...you get the point, followed us and was watching as we were sitting on the pier enjoying the Gulf of Mexico and the breeze, but not in a Brokeback way. About two minutes after sitting down, we see a light shining our way and hear over a loudspeaker, "Trespassing!" We walk back, jump back over the fence and talk with the police officer who basically tells us we're assholes for jumping a fence, gives us the whatfor and then sends us on our way unscathed. By the time we got back to the Marlin, everyone was in bed, and that was a smart move for us to do as well.

Saturday, we rented scooters, and if you've never had the chance to see 12 grown-ass men on scooters, it's a site to see. I think there are pictures somewhere, and yes, that is AYB3 with a helmet on. Just because they've had 116 major injuries this year doesn't scare the rest of us (yes, I did just read about that today.) 6pm rolls around, we start drinking in the room, go to dinner, beers are still flowing, back to the bars. We went to Fat Tuesday, which if you've never been, don't go. They have the margaritta-type drinks with grain alcohol in them. Three "190 Octane's" later and I couldn't see. All in all a good night. Not nearly as exciting for me as Friday, but extremely fun nonetheless, and it's ALWAYS good to hang out with the boys and drink ourselves silly for a few days in a place that we would've not normally gone to alone.

Sunday, we got up, did some breakfast and it was back on the road. And here we are, on Wednesday, working off a bit of a cold, working hard, and getting myself ready for another Savannah invasion, this time with Wolv mixed in with Cheese and the Hunt! Should be some times.

The new place of mine is cool, great locale and I invite everyone that reads to come down and walk to some cool bars with me and enjoy the Florida lifestyle. Congrats to Earp and Smoke on their upcoming wedding, as well as AY and his bride, and The Beef and his lovely. I'm honored to be standing up for you guys, and I look forward to the stories of my antics afterwards.

Sorry...BUT...

Sorry for not writing about Key West, and the debacle that was. I WILL write it down on here tomorrow, Wednesday, for those interested. While you wait, check out the full length independent film that I did two years ago. It's interesting, and if you ask, "What's going on in it?" Your guess is as good as mine.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-3990108174547613353

Enjoy!

!!!KEY WEST UPDATE COMING!!!

I'll write a recap of my latest trip to Key West on TUESDAY, MAY 2! Sorry for the delay, it's been a little crazy in my world...